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Introduction

Greeting there fellow pirate, EITC, Navy, or whatever you are. Find yourself in trouble with the law? Maybe with another pirate? How about the EITC for all you pirates out there? And I know that we all have problems with those freaks of nature, the dreaded Undead Forces of Jolly Roger. But we're here to help with any problem, big or small.



Why we're here

We're here because I have noticed more and more pirates and such have had issues. We want to help YOU. Any problem, big or small, mental or physical, emotional or not, we WILL help. Even those cases labled as "Incurable." Time isn't the only way sometimes, sometimes it's the only seen way, but there is usually another that does not involve killing ones self. We will use any method possible to help. There's always help out there now that we're here.


What we do

Even though obvious, we help with any problems that you may have. The problems our CEO, Davy Hookwrecker, specializes in would be emotional problems/ relationship problems. He is also usually great at persuasion, just ask Mr. Plunderbones. He will tell you for sure.


Dealing with the law

The law would be considered EITC, Navy, Royal guards, and etc. Maybe you pestered them enough and now look, a price on ye head. That isn't fun, always hiding while your comrads are living the true Pirate Life, on the open ocean, sailing free as the wind. We will interogate the Govt. of the country after you, and possibly stop all hunters from chasing you.

No shackles

Relationship/Emotion problems

This is the field that CEO Davy Hookwrecker will almost ALWAYS be working in, not that he won't help with other problems though. He finds these cases the most interesting, and can usually help if you're open to it. We do it all here, Weddings and Divorces, case working, etc. Need to sue? We do that too! Maybe you were classified as crazy and you're feeling depressed. Well that's not a problem, becasuse the CEO would probably be classified as Mental, also. But we're here to help, with plenty of chocolate.


Mission statement

Our mission statement is pretty obvious: We're here to help.


Members

CEO/President- Davy Hookwrecker

Vice president-

Law field management-

Relationship/Emotion field management-Davy Hookwrecker

Rules manager-

Law manager- (Helps submit/ write new laws for a Govt.)

On the go?

On the go and can't get help instantly? Pull out that shellphone and call us at: 1-800-Get-Help This line is for questions, comment, concersn and cases.


Our thanks

Thank you for choosing Hookwrecker Law Firm, and remember, it's always our pleasure.

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